When I posted my last blog entry "When Love Gets Ugly" many readers thought I was referring to the unfortunate situation between Chris Brown and Rihanna. But I wasn't. I have deliberately stayed away from the topic because there has been so much speculation and, no matter what, no one can ever really know what goes on between two people in their relationship. But then the pictures came out. OMG! Heartbreaking. Seeing the scars and bruises on Rihanna's pretty face was very hurtful, more so because it was clear that her scars are more than just physical but inevitably emotional in nature. Essentially I felt sorry for her and I still do. Especially now with major newspaper outlets reporting that the two songbirds have reunited. I must say I am not surprised but I am scared. Scared that it can happen again, scared that she blames herself, scared that she really believes he can change, scared that next time it can be much much worse.
Maybe it's because I'm a mother of teenage daughter, maybe it's because as I child I saw my parents fight, or maybe it's because I've had my own brief encounter with abuse (you have to get my book and read the introduction to get all the details). Whatever the reason, I feel compelled to remind Rihanna and other young women who have been abused or are in abusive relationships (because let's face it! Domestic abuse is a big problem with many nameless victims) this one thing: When someone hits you once, they will hit you again. It's a fact.
In fact, the likelihood that an abuser will abuse again is very high. So with that in mind it is my hope that after spending time with her Mr. Brown and attempting a reconciliation she comes to her senses. Maybe he's ll do or say something stupid that will show her what time it really is. Maybe after spending time with him she'll realize he's not all that , after all. Maybe, maybe not. It's all I can do but hope for the best but expect the worse.