Thursday, June 12, 2008

Close Call

I don't know if you know but the city has been crazy hot for the past few days. Old people had to be hospitalized. Kids were crying. Power was going out all over the place. And the streets were sweltering. But that was nothing compared to heat that was coming from between my legs. Yes dammit I said it. I was crazy hot from the heat and I was horny too. Talk about miserable. Usually I'll exercise or take a yoga class--sweat it out--when I'm feeling like this but it was already hot. I was already sweating. I didn't feel like exercising I only wanted to do one thing and one thing only and I'm sure you can guess what it was. To my defense, I'm a big girl who can handle her bouts of horniness very well thank you. But it's something about the summer heat and sucking on ice and being home walking around in panties and a bra and being all sticky and sweaty that I found extremely distracting. I couldn't concentrate. All I could do was sweat. And so I am sitting home sweating and--don't you know it!!-the phone rings. Oh yeah. And on the other line, panting like a dog in heat, was my ex, telling me he was thinking about me all day. Telling me about his erection at work. Telling me all sorts of things but after the erection part I stooped listening. In my head I was already in the bed with him. Rolling around in the sheets. Still sweating, yes, but now with a purpose! One thing I can say about the relationship was that despite our differences and problems the sex was friggin' amazing. I sometimes think I was really in love with the sex more than I was in love with him. Or maybe not. Can't go there in my mind and try to figure all of that out right now. I'm too busy trying to figure out why I didn't just go for it, get my needs met, get a good one in with the ex for old times sake. But of course all joking aside I know why. Because I knew better. What would have been the point? I am going to be horny again next week, and definitely next month. And I'm not in a relationship. I'm not married. I'm not in love. I don't have a steady beau. So this is going to have to be my problem. I am going to have to handle this like the grown woman I am. And, for me, jumping in the bed with an ex who already broke my heart or even someone I just met who has no clues to the depths of my heart is not at all appealing. So instead of telling my ex to come over, I told him good night, hung up the phone, poured myself a glass of ice water and took a cool bath. Ahhh. But it was, indeed, a close call. Phew! Real close.

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